Sickness and Suckouts

I am the suckout king!

Friday night was homegame night. I'd been looking forward to it for weeks.

Thus it was somewhat unfortunate that I had to take Thursday off work, through finally succumbing to the bug that's been ailing me for the last week or so. I just finally ran out of energy.

Like one of those little bunnies in the Duracell advert, I abruptly ground to a halt.

A lazy day in bed left me feeling better, but unfortunately the little one has been continuing to suffer too, and by Friday she sounded like a 70-year old man after a lifetime of 40 cigarettes a day.

With her temperature in the high fever range, I called in a holiday and took the day off to help Mrs Div keep a close watch on her.

By the evening her temperature had declined, so I didn't feel too guilty about heading out to play poker.

I was running quite late, and missed the first game.

Before departing I did contemplate 'doing a Hellmuth' and calling the guys to tell them to post and fold for me until I arrived, but decided against it. I was still pretty run down, so didn't see the point in rushing along only to bring my D-game to the table.

Of course I told the guys I was just being sporting and giving someone else a chance to win a game.

By the time we were ready for game two, I'd had the chance to down a few beers and wind down.

We were six handed for a £10 buy-in NLH game, with one newcomer to the group. Allan was later to suffer one of my outdraws.

We tend to play pretty deep stacks and a slow clock, so the structure suits me. I'm not so used to playing short handed, as online I almost exclusively play ten handed cash games.

Adopting my starting hand standards for different game types is one aspect of my play I've been working on.

Consequently as the night went on, and the blinds increased, I found myself in a few marginal situations, all but one of which went my way.

Allan went down when my KQ beat out his AT when I made a pair on the flop.

Now in possession of a big stack, I started to try some selective bullying, which went wrong when a big raise with QT was reraised all-in by short-stack Pat (previously christened Party Poker Pat by me, after an outrageous outdraw run).

He didn't have enough chips to push me off the hand, and my gut feel was I was up against an underpair, so the call was easy.

Doh! How wrong could I be? He had AQ, and I was in a bad spot. Until that is, a T hit the board, and sent Pat to the rail.

He took it well, but I'm banned from using the Party Poker Pat nickname now.

Ultimately I was heads up with Steph, and had him comfortably outchipped. Steph is a tough opponent and much more a SNG and tourney specialist than me, so I didn't want to let him back in by giving him any cheap double throughs.

He survived one sticky situation with a rivered straight, but when I flopped top pair against his flush draw, the chips went in and no flush card emerged.

Over the night I don't think I laid an outrageous bad beat on anyone, but I certainly carried some luck.

Perhaps my newly commissioned card protector can take the credit.

One of Mrs Div's new friends from the breast feeding support group runs a franchise for producing casts or imprints of kids hands and feet.

Hence my new card protector is a cast of a 2-month old babies fist. Pretty cool I thought...

Wisdom Of The Wife

First things first, I finally won one of those big all-in pre-flop Omaha hands that I've been chatting about recently. Lucrative. Boy did it feel good.

Also, hello to any visitors from Guinness and Poker. I had a great time with Iggy, my writeup is here.

Onwards to the post proper....

Scene 1: Me upstairs in computer room, wife downstairs in TV room.

Her: 'Hey, come down I think you will like this!'
Me: 'Like what?'
Her: 'It's the MTV "making of" for the new Jessica Simpson video.'
(sound of thundering feet)
Me: 'mmmhhhhmmgggghhhhh'
Her: 'Do you think that look is deliberate?'
Me: 'What look?'
Her: 'Well Jessica sorta looks a bit grubby, like she kinda needs a good scrub. Don't you think?'
Me: (faints)

Scene 2: Both in TV room, me on laptop playing poker, Scrubs on TV. Dorian needs early morning advice, rushes around to hot ex-girlfriend to chat.

Me: (looking up from laptop) 'Who's the hot ex-girlfriend? I sorta recognise her.'
Her: 'Oh that's the girl from American Pie?'
Me: 'Ah. Tara Reid!'
Her: 'Yeah, that's right. She's a dirty girl!'
Me: 'Huh?'
Her: 'Well, she is always in trouble. Turning up drunk for premieres, boobs hanging out, that sorta stuff.
Me: 'I see. You have a way with words. Tara Reid is a dirty girl. Gotta be worth a Google!!'
(Googles)
(Drools)

WARNING - Actual poker content ahead.

Scene 3 - The TV room, again. Me playing poker on laptop, again.

Her: (laughs out loud)
Me: 'Wassup?'
Her: 'Well, everytime I look at you, you have a sort of incredulous expression on your face.'
Me: 'Ah, well, I'm playing Pot Limit Omaha, and when I'm not in a hand I watch the betting to see how the other guys play. I try to work out what logically they can be holding, but I hardly ever get it right.'
(pause)
Me: 'Look, here's one. Three guys putting a lot of cash in on the flop with an obvious made straight and a flush draw. The guy doing the betting MUST have the straight. But there can't be two guys drawing to the nut flush.'
(pause)
Me: 'Yep, straight holds up. One guy missed his flush draw. Don't even know what the other guy was trying for. He just did his entire stack on it though'
Her: 'Why?'
Me: (grinning)'Who knows?'


I'm getting somewhat suspicious of the wife's sudden fondness for bringing 'dirty girls' to my attention. I suspect a plot to bring forward the schedule for baby two.

I can see the conversation now. Me, quoting finances, living space, and other such practicalities. Her, 'Oh look, there's the Jessica video on MTV again. She really DOES look dirty dontcha think?'. Me, undressing.....

Oh Woe Is Me

I've had a pretty grim last few days.

Work is a bit of a nightmare at present. Last night I got home from my 9 til 5 job at 11pm. Now, I'm definitely more of an evening than morning person, but that's taking it to extremes.

The entire family (all 3 of us) have a cold at present. Mrs Div is worst off, baby Div is coughing and sneezing, but otherwise unaffected, and I'm teetering in between. Absolutely shattered, but otherwise getting by.

It's one of those situations where if I worked for 'Huge Corporation Inc' I'd be tucked up at home for a few days. Working for a tiny company I just don't feel I can do that when we have deadlines to hit.

Mind you, staying at home isn't always such a great option. The damn cat is in a helluva mood at present. Twice this weekend he bit me while I was playing poker.

I can cope with a fair few distractions, but when I'm three tabling Pot Limit Omaha - three being the most my feeble brain and monitor combination can manage - the last thing I need is a demented feline channeling the spirit of his ancestors on the Serengeti to mangle my arm.

To add to my woes, last week I finally got my act together and sorted out a rakeback account. My first sign up - Eurobet. Tarnation. Could my timing have been any worse?

I also signed up to InterPoker, and having cleared the Eurobet sign up bonus last week, I set about the InterPoker small stakes PLO tables.

Perhaps playing on the weekend was an influence, but my initial impression was there was no difference in standard or style of play between Crypto and Party. Both sites play very loose-aggressive at my buy-in level, whereas PokerStars tends to feel more loose-passive.

Very loose-aggressive makes for a swingy, but potentially profitable game. As an example, I offer up a big hand I lost. I can't say I was delighted to lose it, but if people keep offering these odds to me, I'll take it every time.

This is from memory, but I checked the stats straight after so they are definitely accurate.

On the hand in question I am under the gun and find AAQ8ss. Having only played a few orbits, I've established small raises will not be respected, and being in poor position, I decide to limp with my original buy-in almost intact, and hammer the flop if I hit.

There are a couple of calls, a mid-position raise, more flat calls (told you!), and the obvious table maniac reraises the maximum. Folded round to me, with the pot now big enough to facilitate a meaningful reraise.

In previous posts, I've touched on learning that overplaying aces in Omaha can be very painful, but I figure in this situation I am now in a position to be either heads up or three way to a flop with probably the best hand, and a fair amount of dead money in the pot. So, I reraise the maximum.

The original raiser flat calls, the maniac reraises all-in, I call all-in, as does the original raiser.

Cards on their backs, and my AAQ8ss is up against KK23ds(maniac) and an ace and three low cards single suited (original raiser).

My immediate reaction is 'woowhoo'! My second reaction is do these guys think we are playing Hi/Lo?

Of course the flop/turn brings two 2s putting the maniac ahead with trips, and the river completes a wheel for the original raiser.

At which point I groan and reload, as the maniac berates the winner as, and I kid you not, a 'lucky fish'. No mention of my holding.

Back to the Cardplayer Omaha calculator, to discover pre-flop I was 52% to win the hand. So I got my cash in at roughly 5/2 on a better than evens shot.

I'll lose 48% of the time, but that's still a massively +EV bet. Even better, at least one of the two guys I was up against didn't even seem to realise he was a huge dog in the hand.

Losing in this situation is hardly a cause for celebration, but definitely an incentive to get back around the table with these guys as often as possible!

Ah, just typing that makes me feel better. My woes recede...

Empire Fights Back

Yet another reload bonus. There's gonna be a lot of grinding over the next week or two!

I wonder if Party anticipated such a vigorous response, so quickly, from their competitors?

Judging by today's UK newspapers, 'the market' seems to be broadly neutral on the Party move, which suggests to me it might have been more hassle than it was worth.

I also wonder whether we might see the ultimate weapon rolled out by someone soon.

Not rakeback; but rake cut.

Which site wants to really grab the attention of the customers by cutting their fees. $2 or $3 on a $20 pot at 2/4 seems awfully steep to me, there must be scope for more competition in this area.

Time will tell.

Let Battle Commence

I see PokerStars and Absolute Poker have opportunistically rushed out new reload bonuses to take advantage of the Party Poker upheaval.

It remains to be seen who will do best out of this, but expect PokerStars to be rolling out a 'worlds biggest poker site' campaign anytime now.

In the short term, it looks like the Party rump sites will be shark infested waters, but I wonder how the long term will pan out.

Coral Eurobet has just been bought by Gala Casinos, who are a big UK B&M operation - there are three Gala casinos in Glasgow alone.

I'd expect Gala to go down the 888.com route, and try to create a casino and poker site, but they can add a third and fourth unit too, as the combined company are big B&M bingo and bookmaking operators.

We all know how juicy the Pacific Poker players can be, so maybe you shouldn't uninstall your Party skin software just yet.

More Party Poker High Jinks

So, the Party Poker 'upgrade'...

Firstly, what nitwit decided to run an upgrade on a Saturday afternoon(US) or evening(Europe)?

I've worked in IT for ten years, and would have been laughed off every project I ever worked on for suggesting rolling out new software as peak operating hours approached.

It's annoying enough being crashed out of a cash game, but the amount of STT and MTT players affected must be in the thousands.

Secondly, I really don't like the new games as a player, though from a shareholder perspective I can see why they make sense to Party.

If some degenerate gambler wants to blow his cash on Party, I'd rather he did it capping it pre-flop against me with 73s due to it's powerful flushing and straightening possibilities, rather than by handing the cash to Party on a sidebet.

Thirdly, it looks like they have hived off the skin players into a separate database! Right now I am logged into Party, Empire, and Eurobet, and can see the following:

Site	Tables	Players
Party	1864	12748
Empire	560	3797
Eurobet	563	3853

They are also allowing people to 8 table now.

This looks like an attempt to get all the high volume grinders back onto the main site, and off the skin sites offering rakeback. Whether this will work remains to be seen.

Perhaps some people might prefer playing on a site with less grinders.

I'm surprised Party didn't need to publicise this change in advance, as they are now a FTSE100 company. However, I did note that when Sporting Bet pulled out of their takeover bid for Empire, it was stated:

"Neither company provided further details though one source familiar with the matter told AFX News Sportingbet had been concerned by Empire Online's relationship with its bigger rival PartyGaming PLC."

So perhaps the skins already had wind of this.

If this is true, I'm amazed the skins are signed up to an agreement that lets Party cut them off from one of their biggest selling points.

The next few days should be interesting, to see how people react.

Personally, I haven't had time to think it all through properly yet.

Happy Days

Too tired to play tonight. Boy does work suck right now!

Sitting watching an old Late Night Poker episode with amongst others Kevin O'Connell, Willie Tann, Padraig Parkinson, and Phil Hellmuth!

The commentary team, Jesse May and Barny Boatman. Barny's first words of the night (after Jesse has intro'ed as the first hand is played): 'Evening Jesse. Didn't take Phil long to start moaning.'

Bliss. Time for another beer.

Party Poker Having A Laugh

Their latest bonus is a fairly generous 30% to $100 with seven times raked hands.

Nice, but why 30% to $100; why not to $120 so the probable deposit is $400 rather than $333?

Or am I just a pedantic freak?

Checking The Nuts

I've never been a particularly sporty person.

When I was younger, I did play football, badly. My style was more rugged midfield enforcer/hatchet man full-back, than silky midfield play-maker, or dashing goalscorer. I did enjoy it, just wasn't any good at it.

For some reason I got into table tennis, and was pretty decent in a peer comparison sense, but my aptitude for that faded along with my eyesight.

Since then I've just toddled along, with only intermittent bouts of physical endeavour. I'm one of the fortunates for whom weight has never been a real problem.

My occasional bursts of gym going were aimed more at building up, than slimming down, and needed the assistance of copious amounts of protein supplements to have an appreciable effect.

Walking to and from train stations is the height of my current exertions, and poker isn't likely to have me in peak condition.

All that said, I do worry about my health sometimes. More from the perspective of will I be around for my family as they grow up, rather than 'I don't wanna die!!!'

So, I have started paying attention to things like cholesterol levels, blood pressure, body fat ratio, etc.

I'm also conscious of quite a few heart attack or cancer victims within the family gene pool. The dual curses of the Scottish NHS.

So, I am inclined to pay attention to issues such as getting regular check ups, looking out for signs of disease, etc.

Which makes it all the crazier to me that this campaign caused such a furore...

You can check the link if you wish, but the executive summary would be that Ricky Gervais (of The Office fame) has done a fabulous campaign to support prostate cancer treatment, yet the idiotic radio regulators initially wanted to restrict it's broadcast on some sort of decency grounds.

It's fine to have all sorts of crap about sex, guns, violence, or just general idiocy and banality from presenters, broadcast at any time of day or night, but a campaign by an award winning star, which could save lives, was supposed to be a post-watershed event?

Fortunately common sense has prevailed and the regulators have backed down in the face of public ridicule. You can listen to the ad here.

Office chat about this issue reminded me of an earlier men's health campaign, which I think may be of interest to some of you out there.

Rachel Stevens, a UK singer/actress did a campaign to promote awareness of testicular cancer.

As a sort of UK Lindsay Lohan, the idea of Rachel encouraging males to touch themselves is nothing new (as the ad slyly acknowledges). The target demographic may have been slightly older though.

I thought the campaign was very well done, and worth sharing with you.

So, if you are a male poker player, do as Rachel says, and check your nuts.

Let's face it, after all those Party Poker inflicted kicks to the junk, there's a severe risk of damage down there!

Wild Weekend

Poker and babies - guaranteed to screw with your body clock.

By Friday last week, I was really shattered and looking forward to the weekend. Saturday evening was planned to be our first big night out since the birth of Baby Div. Drinks, and a late dinner with friends, with a possible casino visit to round off the night.

First though, I needed sleep. I crashed the second I got home, and was out like a light. Several hours later, refreshed and ready for action, I emerged from beneath the covers.....at midnight.

With the little one asleep, Mrs Div headed for bed leaving me in charge of feeding and changing duties. The plan being that she would get a decent sleep, while I stayed up for a few hours.

A few hours...seven to be precise. I played poker all through the night. Which was great. I won some cash, I had fun, and when baby awoke, I got to spend time with her. Recently, with work and other demands, I haven't been spending as much time with her as I'd like, so even changing nappies has a certain appeal at present.

Of course, come the daytime, I had a different perspective on things. Two hours sleep is not the best way to prepare for a busy day, and a heavy night.

Which perhaps explains why after copious amounts of alcohol, and a nice meal, I found myself in the Gala Merchant City casino, with cash in my pocket, my gambling pals by my side, and no urge whatsoever to play.

Remembering whether standing or hitting holding 13 when the dealer is showing a 2 is the optimum play, was more than my feeble brain could cope with. Staying on my feet was as much as I could manage.

So to Sunday, a day of rest. Or not, as the case may be. At midday my plans for the day were unclear. I knew Iggy was in the country, but whether we could meet up was not yet determined.

One brief call from Edinburgh to Glasgow set the wheels in motion, and the seeds of my killer hangover were sown.

I believe my parting words to Mrs Div were along the lines "I'll just have a few quiet drinks. Shouldn't be too late."

So how was it that nine hours later, I was sending a text message (didn't want to wake the baby) saying "Missed last train. Back in morning. Sorry!"

The answer to that question may well be out there somewhere, but I don't have it!

More specifically, I still can't work out how I went from checking my watch at 10.30pm and thinking "Two trains to go, need to make plans for leaving soon" to re-checking it at precisely 11.30pm and thinking "Shiiiiit, the last train just left!"

Things I CAN recall:

- Iggy is a total gent, and a pleasure to spend time with
- As is his dad, a man who epitomises the phrase unflappable
- They travel in style, as evidenced by a very comfortable carpet
- An evening with Iggy has convinced me I need to win a big MTT so I can afford a trip to one of the Vegas get togethers
- The 5.52am train was very quiet, thankfully
- Work on Monday was torture, but the pain was worth it

Hangover From Hell

My skull is playing host to a herd of stampeding buffalo; my stomach is churning like a washing machine; memories of last night are somewhat hazy.

If I told you I spent the evening drinking Guinness, and got my ass handed to me at heads up limit hold em by a poker playing dwarf, I'm sure you would understand.

September Summary

It's good to talk.

The relatively small amount of poker I had been playing this month had been going pretty well until last weekend - the results of which I documented previously.

The upshot of that disastrous session was my entire profit for the month was eliminated, and I was well into the red.

Had the month ended then, this would have been one depressing summary.

Fortunately for my sanity and bankroll, not to mention that of you, my tiny but loyal readership, there was still the chance to stage a rescue mission.

Stage one of that mission was purging my demons on these very pages. Above all else, this blog gives me an outlet for thoughts and frustrations that would otherwise gnaw away at my innards for a great deal longer than the time it takes to get them into electronic print.

Stage two was getting involved in a thread, initiated by another poster on Blonde Poker, discussing how to play aces in Omaha. Bouncing thoughts and ideas off infinitely more skilled players, and learning from their, as well as my, experiences, gave me the motivation to get back to the tables and apply the harshly taught lessons.

Stage three was the return to the tables. In the last week, I managed four sessions of Pot Limit Omaha on Poker Stars, and posted four profitable results.

Just enough to put me back at break even for the month, and that's a genuine break even - not a poker player's definition of break even (lost an affordable amount).

Most encouragingly for me, I do feel my game has taken a step forward in the past week. Several hands I played in the last few days had outcomes different to that which would have occurred last weekend.

'Frustration calls' - where I just knew I'd been outdrawn but couldn't bring myself to acknowledge it - have been excised from my game, for the time being at least. I even folded the nut flush to a very likely full house.

My patience has been restored. When opportunities arise, I am attacking ruthlessly.

If I can maintain this discipline in the long term, I am optimistic about the impact on the quality of my play, and ultimately my bankroll.

Sweet Lord!!

Count me in........

I have registered to play in the
Online Poker Blogger Championship!

This event is powered by PokerStars.

Registration code: 5749840

Just A Thought

With my pretty decent Google ranking, people occasionally blunder by on the most unexpected search terms. Sometimes they even find me with searches about poker!

I've been posting quite a lot about Omaha poker recently, so there's always the chance a few searches might hit me based on that.

If you happen to find this post whilst searching on Omaha poker, for goodness sake disregard anything I say, and get over to the experts...

Milkybarkid - just won a nice prize in London
Internet Poker Pro - gotta love that pick axe handle story!

That is all.

Reflections On The Weekend

I was pretty miffed on Sunday morning, as memories of the night before reverberated through my aching brain.

Six months ago I'd have been stomping around like a bear with a sore head, and back on the tables by lunchtime. Hoping to recoup my losses from tired, drunk west coast Americans.

Instead I spent the morning with wife and daughter. Somehow the poker tables don't seem half as important when there's an infant asleep on my chest, her tiny hand grasping my shirt as she cosily snuggles in.

Right now, I'd say that's the greatest feeling in the world. There's a benign tranquility that comes from knowing that I helped make her, and right now that little bundle of perfection is entirely reliant on Mrs Div and I.

Nothing else matters to us half as much as she does.

With this new found outbreak of common sense in my life, I was able to review the previous night's activities with a clearer sense of perspective than normal.

For someone who has been playing poker for less than a year, I've an awful tendency to lapse into a superiority complex when playing.

Just because say 40% of the table are demonstrably terrible - like the guy who just called a raise with A567, flopped no obvious draw on a flushing board but still called another big bet and runner-runnered an ignorant straight - I tend to assume I'm clearly superior to everyone. Which obviously is not the case.

Consequently there's a tendency to assume losing hands are bad luck rather than bad play. Often they are, but there were quite a few from this weekend where I was clearly the sinner rather than sinned against.

Having accepted that, I was trying to figure out the root cause of the bad plays, and this led me to a conclusion that slightly surprised me, though in retrospect it makes perfect sense.

Normally I'm an extremely patient player. When I play live, whether homegames, or my occasional forays in casino or card club, I am invariably the table rock.

When I blow the dust off my chips and stick them in the middle, people sit up and take notice.

That style of play is actually easier for me to maintain live than online at present. When I go to play B&M the night is set aside. There are no distractions from the game.

At home, even though I can multitable and see a ton more hands, there are other unpredictable demands on my time. Each session can end at any moment.

This wouldn't be a problem if I was maintaining the long view, but I've been too focused on each session as an atomic event, rather than looking at the long term bankroll trend. I've been chasing.

Consequently I've been guilty of trying to make things happen when the circumstances are unfavourable. Trying to push people off hands, chasing draws when the odds aren't there, overvaluing my strong hands, too much speculative limping.

For someone who is far from an action junkie, I've been seeing a lot of action!

Aggression with a purpose is one of the biggest weapons in the poker armoury; aggression for the sake of aggression is a leak of Titanic proportions.

There aren't many sports or activities where the superior player or team can always prevail, no matter the circumstances, through pure aggression. Poker certainly isn't one of them.

So, I have resolved to sit back, and let the cards fall as they may. When they fall well I play, when they fall badly I fold, and if I'm down at close of play, it's irrelevant. The long term trend is all.

My motto for this week: No more chasing!

The Poker Gods Giveth...

...and taketh away.

What a beating I took last night at the Omaha tables!! Even Rocky would have been on his knees crying 'No mas' by the end of the night. FIVE buy-ins frittered away.

Everything that could go wrong did go wrong.

- I played a few monster pots abysmally
- The man with no fold button hit every draw imaginable
- Every flop I hit seemed to give someone else a huge draw
- My big draws wouldn't come in
- I just couldn't get anyone to fold to a bet
- As the night went on, I let it get a bit personal

By the close of play, my head was spinning. My screen name should have been Tilty McTilter.

Unfortunately I don't have time to go over it in detail tonight, but I reckon maybe two-thirds of the losses were self inflicted.

Mostly from a huge pot where having almost doubled my buy-in on one table, I got massively involved pre-flop with AAxx single suited, against the table idiot, who held AAKQ and hit a Broadway straight.

From that fiasco I've drawn two lessons. Don't overvalue your hand pre-flop, and even morons get dealt monsters.

The same guy outdrew my made hand by calling pot size bets on flop and turn to hit a backdoor flush holding the TWO AND THREE of spades. So much for only drawing to the nuts!

Another big pot went down when I flopped top two pair with the nut-flush draw, against a guy who had slow played aces and flopped a set.

With my AJ and two hearts I knew I might be behind to a set. However the way the table was playing, I could easily be ahead of a smaller two pair, or someone drawing to a smaller flush, so I figured it was worth the gamble.

That was late on and the tilt factor was high by that point. At the time it felt right to get all the cash in on the flop, but now I'm not so sure. I need to run it through Cardplayer to see just how good/bad a move it was.

Still, we live and learn, and there's no harsher way to learn than bleeding your cash across the ether.

I ran into quite a few situations last night that I hadn't previously experienced, including the classic Omaha hand where my top two pair were actually a very marginal dog to the foe with an open ended straight draw, and the nut flush draw with two overs.

My initial reaction when he outdrew me was that it was a suckout, but I ran the cards through the Cardplayer simulator, and there is was in black and white, the cards ran true!

It's one thing to read that in a book, it's quite another to actually have it happen to you for the first time!

Last night's cards go into the 'Lessons Learned' folder. Next session I hope to apply those lessons well.

Further Adventures In Omaha (and Orwell)

I've had a blast tonight on the PokerStars $50 Pot Limit Omaha tables.

Having recouped all my losses from the insanely misguided session earlier this week, I even added some black numbers to the bankroll spreadsheet.

I played three tables, making unspectacular progress on two, but absolutely killing the third. Every draw hit, every bluff got through, I was flying.

Some of the hands people will call down with beggar belief.

Anything less than a set on the flop gets my nerves jangling if someone calls my bet, yet time and again I see people drawing to straights when there's a flush draw out, calling down with two pair when there's been a bet and a call on a flush board, or raising with two pair into someone with top set.

What can be frustrating is having an obvious fish lay some crazy suckout on me, then watching helpless as they donate their entire stack to someone else on the very next hand.

In a limit hold em game, most half-decent players would be licking their lips when they spot a table with VPIP beyond 50%. Some of these PLO tables are running at 70-80% VPIP and this is big bet poker - the buy-in might only be $50 but some of the pots are approaching $100.

Added to the financial and fun aspects, I also hit a new milestone in my online poker experience. My first ever chat yellow card from PokerStars support.

Maybe it's just me, but I thought it was a tad harsh. I've seen some real redneck stuff in the chat across the various sites I play on. Generally I ignore it, or when I'm in mischievous mode I go for a teasing riposte.

My weakness is while I can usually (but not always) hold fire when some fish rivers me - not wanting to scare them away - I sometimes can't resist sticking my tuppence worth into other people's discussions.

The action tonight was that one player had laid a river suckout on his foe, and was taking some flak for it. His riposte was along the lines 'My BR is more than you've won in your life'.

Now that's the second time this week I've heard that line. A few days ago some muppet was claiming he was superior to the rest of the table as he had won $20,000 last year.

You show me someone who won $20,000 last year and is playing $50 PLO this year, and I'll show you a moron who can't manage money.

So tonight I couldn't resist a little dig of my own. The entire extent of which was 'BR? Bull**** ratio?' (N.B. I used **** in the actual chat)

The guy continued his little verbal war for a few more minutes before leaving without making any comment to me. Literally five minutes later I get a popup warning in the Stars client, and an email message...

"We have received a complaint regarding some things you said in chat at our tables. I have reviewed the chat log and did find some of your comments to be inappropriate.

Our goal at PokerStars is to be a fun place to play, where everyone can feel comfortable. Foul language and abuse of other players takes away from everyone's enjoyment, and therefore cannot be permitted.

We must ask you to refrain from using this type of language in the future, or we will be forced to remove your chat privileges.

Please note that you may not be the only one receiving a message such as this. When we receive a chat complaint, we review the entire chat of all players at the table.
Any other offenders at the table were also warned or revoked as appropriate to our policies.

Regards,

Gabriel
PokerStars Support Team

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26968401 bull**** ratio? 4 9/23/2005 7:25:40 PM"

Now, full marks to Stars for speed of action. Their support is clearly a notch above most sites, but come on! What a load of crap. If I'd omitted the **** would it still have been inappropriate. Orwell comes to online poker!

Anyway, the table was still going with most of the same players, so I couldn't resist mentioning it. Cue much hilarity/incredulity, and on with the game!

Bloody Hell

I was just about to knock up a small post recording the fact that today is my 5th wedding anniversary, when I decided to run through Bloglines first.

Noticing that Sir Al was back in action, I clicked on his site, and saw this!

Wow. What are the odds on that!?

The Blogger Handbook

Reporters Without Borders have published an interesting handbook aimed at encouraging people to blog, especially in countries where the 'normal' press is repressed or state-controlled.

The Handbook For Bloggers and Cyber Dissidents can be found here.

Adventures In Omaha

Been having (mostly) fun on the $50 Pot Limit Omaha tables on Pokerstars over the last few nights.

I consider myself very much as a beginner at this game. I'm still struggling to get to grips with what does and doesn't constitute a pre-flop raising hand, so I tend to play very tight-passive pre-flop, and hope to hit a monster, or at very least a nut draw.

Based on my reading to date, this isn't optimum strategy, but it seemed to be working pretty well for me. I was generally finishing each session with a reasonable profit.

The texture of the Stars tables can change very quickly. Some tables see seven players to every flop, with no raise. Others see three or four at most, with often a raise and re-raise.

On the madder tables, I've been going even tighter, and letting others do the betting into me when I hit.

Last night I decided to attempt a step forward in my strategy, by going into tight-aggressive mode, and leading the betting more often, as the books recommend.

I was not seeing many flops but generally opening for a raise wherever I got the opportunity.

The results were less than stellar. A few times I did get outdrawn by marginal hands, but mostly I just blew money away, betting out with 2nd best hands, or hammering draws that missed.

Most memorably on a 9-high flop I held an overpair and an open ended straight draw.

My pot size bet on the flop got one caller. The turn missed me but I made another pot size bet, which was called, and again missed the river.

Leaving me with a grand total of not very much, as there are now overcards to my pair.

By now it's pretty damn obvious I'm beat. Equally it seems to me I'm going to get called if I bluff into a pretty big pot. So, I check, expecting to fold to a bet.

My opponent checks behind, and shows 99xx for the flopped top set, which was the stone cold nuts at that point!! So with a medium top set on a drawing board, he simply called my bet.

That's the sort of play the books can't legislate for. Some players seem to make up their mind on the flop that they have a hand, and they are seeing a showdown, come-what-may.

Playing too aggressively I was blundering into their 'trap' - effectively handing the cash over without resistance.

Of course when my draws do hit, these are the guys who will pay off big time, but I need to be more discerning about picking my moments to bet.

90 minutes of all-action play saw me down two buy-ins. An exciting, but expensive, way to pass the time.

By now I was feeling pretty tilty, so I logged out and took a breather.

Once I'd calmed down, I returned to the fray, and reverted to my more passive style.

A short session before bed saw me recover a percentage of the losses.

I know it's not recommended to go back to the tables in these circumstances, but sleep would not have come easy otherwise. I hate ending on a down note.

Still in the red for the night, but feeling much better about things, it was off to bed for a sound sleep.