Wisdom Of The Wife

First things first, I finally won one of those big all-in pre-flop Omaha hands that I've been chatting about recently. Lucrative. Boy did it feel good.

Also, hello to any visitors from Guinness and Poker. I had a great time with Iggy, my writeup is here.

Onwards to the post proper....

Scene 1: Me upstairs in computer room, wife downstairs in TV room.

Her: 'Hey, come down I think you will like this!'
Me: 'Like what?'
Her: 'It's the MTV "making of" for the new Jessica Simpson video.'
(sound of thundering feet)
Me: 'mmmhhhhmmgggghhhhh'
Her: 'Do you think that look is deliberate?'
Me: 'What look?'
Her: 'Well Jessica sorta looks a bit grubby, like she kinda needs a good scrub. Don't you think?'
Me: (faints)

Scene 2: Both in TV room, me on laptop playing poker, Scrubs on TV. Dorian needs early morning advice, rushes around to hot ex-girlfriend to chat.

Me: (looking up from laptop) 'Who's the hot ex-girlfriend? I sorta recognise her.'
Her: 'Oh that's the girl from American Pie?'
Me: 'Ah. Tara Reid!'
Her: 'Yeah, that's right. She's a dirty girl!'
Me: 'Huh?'
Her: 'Well, she is always in trouble. Turning up drunk for premieres, boobs hanging out, that sorta stuff.
Me: 'I see. You have a way with words. Tara Reid is a dirty girl. Gotta be worth a Google!!'
(Googles)
(Drools)

WARNING - Actual poker content ahead.

Scene 3 - The TV room, again. Me playing poker on laptop, again.

Her: (laughs out loud)
Me: 'Wassup?'
Her: 'Well, everytime I look at you, you have a sort of incredulous expression on your face.'
Me: 'Ah, well, I'm playing Pot Limit Omaha, and when I'm not in a hand I watch the betting to see how the other guys play. I try to work out what logically they can be holding, but I hardly ever get it right.'
(pause)
Me: 'Look, here's one. Three guys putting a lot of cash in on the flop with an obvious made straight and a flush draw. The guy doing the betting MUST have the straight. But there can't be two guys drawing to the nut flush.'
(pause)
Me: 'Yep, straight holds up. One guy missed his flush draw. Don't even know what the other guy was trying for. He just did his entire stack on it though'
Her: 'Why?'
Me: (grinning)'Who knows?'


I'm getting somewhat suspicious of the wife's sudden fondness for bringing 'dirty girls' to my attention. I suspect a plot to bring forward the schedule for baby two.

I can see the conversation now. Me, quoting finances, living space, and other such practicalities. Her, 'Oh look, there's the Jessica video on MTV again. She really DOES look dirty dontcha think?'. Me, undressing.....